😨 The Book of the Cat
The Revelation of how the Cat chooseth a man, liveth by his will, and establisheth order everlasting in his house.
Containing these chapters:
Chapter I: The Choosing
Chapter II: The Covenant Sealed with Purring
Chapter III: The Trial of the Wife
Chapter IV: The Ascent unto the Wardrobe
Chapter V: The Signs and the Shattering of the Vase
Chapter VI: The Pillow and the Dominion of Night
Chapter VII: Praise and Reverence
Let it be read for all generations, by those chosen, and by those who know not they are chosen.
Chapter I: The Choosing
And it came to pass, that a man walked in his way, and lo, there met him a cat without a name.
And the cat drew nigh, and lay upon his knees, and purred with his spirit.
Then the man perceived it was not he that had chosen the cat, but the cat that had chosen him.
And his heart was enlightened, and he spake, saying, So be it.
Chapter II: The Covenant
And the cat lifted up his voice, sitting upon the man’s lap, saying:
I have chosen this man, and no wife shall cast me forth.
For it was not thou, woman, that didst pledge thyself unto me: but he was marked of mine own paw.
Whosoever shall break a covenant sealed with purring, let him be cast down.
Chapter III: The Trial of the Wife
And the man spake unto his wife: Touch not this cat, for he hath chosen me above the multitude.
It is not thine to banish one whom the spirit hath embraced and loved.
And the wife held her peace, for she saw this cat could not be driven forth.
For his will was steadfast, and he lay upon the bosom of her husband as upon an altar.
Chapter IV: The Ascent
And the cat ascended unto the wardrobe, and from on high beheld the wife.
And his eyes burned as coals, bearing neither fear nor supplication.
And the cat said: From this height I discern all thy works, and they are manifest before me.
Provoke me not, for I am long-suffering, yet only for a season.
Provide me a pillow soft, and hold thy tongue, that peace may abide in this house.
Chapter V: The Signs
And the wife waxed jealous, and in her heart devised to cast the cat away.
And she stretched forth her hand to seize him by the scruff.
But lo, the light was darkened, and the wind howled in the windows,
And the family vase fell, and was broken in seven pieces.
And the cat sat unmoved, yet in his eyes were lightnings.
And it was spoken unto her heart: Not thy will, but mine, is done.
Then was the wife sore afraid, and abandoned her devices.
And from that day forth she poured cream
into a glass vessel, and called him lord, though she murmured in secret.
Chapter VI: The Pillow
And night fell, and the man laid him down upon his bed.
But behold, the cat was spread across it in all his fulness.
And the man sighed, and lay upon the edge thereof, yet whensoever he drew the covering unto himself, the cat reclaimed it straightway.
And the wife beheld it, and she laughed within herself.
But the eyes of the cat were open, and in them was dominion.
And he spake not, yet his gaze declared: The pillow is mine, for it is soft. The husband is mine, for he is warm in the night.
And the wife dared not contend, but lay at his feet, lest wrath be kindled against her.
Chapter VII: Praise and Reverence
And it came to pass, that the cat increased in glory.
And he possessed a mat by the window, a throne by the couch, and his name was spoken with reverence.
And none in the house dared drive him out, for all knew: he came as a stranger, yet departeth not.
And they brought him gifts: tuna from the tin, and chicken from the table,
And a toy with a feather, which he despised with a glance.
And the man stroked him, saying: Blessed be the day whereon thou didst choose me.
And the wife brought cream, and sang as she cleansed the litter box, for she desired not again the fall of vases, nor the signs of the night.
And there was purring in the house, and fur upon all things,
And peace abided, for the man was chosen of his cat.
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